


Tiefling Dreams

by HyperKid



Series: Tiefling Fuckery [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Flirting, Fluff, Fuckery, Gen, Humour, Jester And Molly Fuck With The Nein, Never ask a tief a straight question, Other, Team Tief, Team Tiefling, loaf tief, look it’s 1am what more do you want, silliness, tiefling sleep like sheep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2019-04-26
Packaged: 2020-02-04 12:17:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18604366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HyperKid/pseuds/HyperKid
Summary: Nott has a relatively simple question; don’t tiefling horns get in the way when you’re trying to sleep?Unfortunately, the only tieflings she has to ask are incorrigible fuckwits.





	Tiefling Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> HK: Okay so you know how you have crazy random thoughts in the shower?  
> Mollymauk: I do get my best ideas around being naked and boiling, yes.  
> HK: And you know how sometimes you get out and it’s just “oh that’s the first sentence of that?”  
> Mollymauk: You’re losing me, but go on.  
> HK: And then it’s 1am and you’ve written a pile of crack and don’t know what to do with it?  
> Mollymauk: I have never seen a crack I didn’t know what to do with.  
> HK: ... Yeah, well that just happened. I’m madly in love with you.  
> Mollymauk: Is it the fuckery? Most of you lot seem to love the fuckery.  
> HK: It’s definitely partially the fuckery. 
> 
> WARNINGS!! Jester and Molly are smutty sexual beings and only mildly restrained 
> 
> Disclaimers: is there a fic limit at which point I own these characters? Asking for a me

“So how do you sleep with those things?” Nott asked somewhat randomly, not long after the group had left Allfield. The others exchanged some confused glances, trying to work out who she’d been talking to. The question had come somewhat out of the blue, and most had been lost in their own thoughts. 

 

 

Seeing the almost universal confusion, the goblin girl sighed and rolled her eyes, scooting forward in the cart to give Molly a flick on the horn. 

 

“These, genius. They seem like they’d kinda get in the way.” 

 

Molly blinked, then grinned, raising an eyebrow at her. 

 

“Well I can assure you they don’t come off.” 

 

Nott rolled her eyes again, another long suffering sigh from her lips. 

 

“If you’re going to be a pain in the arse I’ll just ask Jester.” 

 

“Why didn’t you ask me first anyway?” The little blue tiefling wondered, cocking her head to one side. Nott shrugged. 

 

“You looked busy reading Caleb’s spell book, and Molly’s horns are bigger.” 

 

Caleb’s head shot up. 

 

“Reading my what?!” 

 

“Noooooot reading,” Jester teased in a singsong giggle, waving his errant book at him. As he dived across the cart to retrieve it, Beau guided her horse alongside to frown at Molly. 

 

“It’s not a bad question though. Do tieflings use special pillows?” 

 

Molly’s brows rose again and his mouth opened for a sarcastic answer. There was the barest instant of hesitation before a sweet smile crossed his lips. 

 

“Don’t be silly, Beau. We can sleep just fine in human beds. I’ve slept in many.” 

 

The monk rolled her eyes, leaning in the saddle to give his head a shove. 

 

“Come on, man, I’m just asking about logistics! You’ve not got that much hair between those and your thick skull.” 

 

Molly dodged her second reach for his horns and snickered as she flailed to right herself. 

 

“Oh, come on. Isn’t it obvious?” A quick glance around revealed that Fjord, riding a little way ahead, was decidedly Not Getting Involved, though Molly could guess he was listening. Nott and Beau were still watching him, both torn between impatience and curiosity. He sighed dramatically. “Surely you’ve both seen a sheep.” 

 

Dead silence filled the air, even Caleb and Jester turning from their little “discussion” about impromptu illustrations. All eyes swivelled to Jester, who blinked, then grinned and nodded. 

 

“Yeah, come on guys, isn’t it obvious?” 

 

A small, satisfied grin spread across Molly’s lips as he settled back against the side of the cart. The sheer, instant readiness to join in his fuckery reminded him strongly of Yasha. 

 

Nott was wavering, a kind of slow shock spreading across her face as she watched her friend. Beau still looked decidedly sceptical. 

 

“You do not look like a sheep,” the monk pointed out firmly, slowing her horse a little so she was level with the middle of the cart. 

 

“Would you like a demonstration?” Molly twisted a little, holding up the reins. Nott and Beau both stared at him for a moment, then Nott scuttled over to smack Caleb in the knee. 

 

“You go steer, I want to see this!” 

 

“I can steer?” Jester offered, giggling. Beau shook her head quickly. 

 

“No, I gotta be able to see your face so I know if Molly’s full of shit.” 

 

“Bold of you to assume she’d be able to tell,” Molly noted with a soft chuckle of his own. 

 

“Bold of you to assume I’d let it show!” The cleric agreed, crossing her legs and grinning as Caleb made his way to the front of the cart. They weren’t going fast enough for any real concern anyway. 

 

“Fjord, tell me if there is anything coming,” the wizard called as he took his seat and Molly climbed back over the backboard into the bed of the cart. Frumpkin jumped up onto Caleb’s shoulders, facing backwards to get a good view. 

 

Beau rolled her eyes. 

 

“For fucks sake, Molly might as well have dropped the reins.” 

 

But nothing came of her protests, because the first thing Molly did upon finding an open space in the cart was tuck his knees and his elbows in under himself and lay down, his head thunking forward onto his curled up coat. 

 

He looked not unlike Frumpkin doing his best loaf impression, though a little disproportionate. 

 

Beau’s gaze whipped immediately to Jester, who smiled innocently back at her. 

 

“What? It’s true.” She flopped forwards as well, catching herself on her elbows and shuffling into a loaf position of her own, dropping her head onto Fjord’s bag. 

 

Caleb stopped the cart. 

 

“Alright, I have to see this with my own eyes,” he sighed, coming back to his body and turning around slowly. 

 

Silence fell on the road again as even Fjord turned back to look, trepidation writ large on his face. Beau swung down off her horse, stuffing the reins behind one of the water barrels as she swung up into the cart. 

 

A pair of tiefling shoulders remained ominously still. 

 

“Fuck off,” the monk declared, nudging Molly with her foot. The purple tiefling let out a tiny snore, his tail flicking lazily behind him. 

 

Jester’s shoulders began to shake. 

 

Nott edged cautiously closer, peering down at the back of Molly’s head. 

 

“I guess it kind of makes sense... they’re out of the way?” 

 

Another tiny snore that might have been a snort. 

 

Fjord sighed, resting his elbows on his knees. 

 

“Molly, I’ve been sharing a damn room with you. I know you don’t fuckin’ sleep like that.” 

 

Jester surrendered to laughter, flopping over onto her back with her arms wrapped around her waist as though to hold herself together over Beau’s strangled shout of rage. 

 

“Oh my god I can’t believe you actually fell for that!” She gasped, wiping tears from her eyes. Molly’s shoulders were shaking too as he sat up, flopping back against one of the side walls of the cart. 

 

“Humans are so gullible,” he snickered. He couldn’t quite dodge Beau’s punch this time, but he took it in good grace. 

 

“It’s not just me,” Beau protested sullenly, folding her arms and glaring at her companions. Even Caleb had a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Nott believed it too!” 

 

“Not for a minute,” the goblin cut in at once, folding her arms. “I just didn’t want you to feel foolish.” 

 

Jester snickered, rolling onto her side to poke her in the knee. 

 

“Yooooou believed us just a little bit.” 

 

“I did not! Anyway Beau shares a room with you, she should know better.” 

 

“I don’t watch her sleep!” Beau interrupted indignantly, throwing her hands into the air. “That would be creepy!” 

 

“Mostly I just sleep on my back,” Jester chirped into the slightly awkward silence beginning to form, “but if the pillows are really soft and fluffy I can wad it up under my cheek, or tuck the top end in under my horn. It’s better to sleep with people though,” she shot Fjord a sly grin, “cuz then I can snuggle up and not worry about it. 

 

“Do your horns not dig into the other person?” Caleb asked, completely ignoring the blushing half orc. Molly shrugged and stretched, making his way back to the front of the cart. 

 

“Some people are into that,” he paused just long enough to give the wizard a lascivious grin, “but mostly it’s all a matter of angles. I can usually snuggle something out.” 

 

“I wonder what would happen if we snuggled together,” Jester mused as Beau hopped down to reclaim her horse, disgruntled muttering following her the whole time. Molly glanced back at her thoughtfully. 

 

“You know, I’m not sure? But I bet we could work it out.” 

 

“If I lie on my back, you could have your face in my boobs,” Jester chirped happily. Caleb groaned, settling back into place as well and pulling out his book. 

 

“Please, if you two are going to start flirting, do it in Infernal. I need to focus on my reading.” 

 

A pair of identical tiefling expressions turned on him, shocked glee writ large. 

 

“Do we distract you, Mr Caleb?” 

 

“I love dirty talking in Infernal!” 

 

Identical expressions, but wildly different causes. Luckily, they fell immediately to discussing it between them as the group got underway. Nott sighed, dropping down to sit next to Caleb. 

 

“I just wanted to ask a simple question.” 

 

Caleb slipped an arm around her shoulders to give a quick squeeze, already losing himself in his book. 

 

“I do not think anything with those two is ever simple.” 

**Author's Note:**

> HK: There is no person on Earth who can convince me Team Tief didn’t fuck with the Nein about tiefling stereotypes on the regular. Mostly because Laura Bailey and Taliesin Jaffe would probably agree and do it themselves.


End file.
